who the heck is yizack?
8:54 PM
some guy called yizack has previously logged in at this computer. who the hell is he? my dad?uh yeah. I can't stop thinking about it. not since I got out of bed. I mean, not since I saw it. It keeps flashing in my mind, those lyrics: "It's not that I want to shield my feelings, but it's just that I want to make sure I don't get caught up in it, until I forget everything, my dreams..."
I get what mar says about the lyrics.
But I guess I've been telling myself that if he meant it for me, then it's a load of bull.
After all, she DID tell you...that. After that, everything just sort of shattered and it won't ever pick itself up to form a whole again.
I keep telling myself that you have to remember he's one hell of a mushy person who like corny ass songs.
But at the same time, I can't push it out of my mind that that corny ass song is pretty STUPID too. It's not at all nice to listen to. I know dozens more songs that sound tons nicer, so why that song?
But then, I gotta remind myself that his taste in songs probably sucks. Maybe HE finds it nice. It's just a goddamn coincidence, because after what he said, nothing can possibly erase it. Not that song, not one million other songs.
She was right, she shouldn't have mentioned it to me. I already made some progress trying to forget everything. Now I wake up and the first thing that pops into my mind is THAT. ugh. *shakeshead* I'm going to concentrate on Taira-kun. That's a much more worthwhile topic.
Besides I already realised that I'm nothing compared to him. I'll never be good enough for him, the J-punk swearing woman that I am. So I better just be content with that realisation.
I now feel uncomfortable. After what her mom said. It HAS crossed my mind. And a split second later I keep saying and praying please God no. Not Na'im. But sometimes I wonder what it'd be like. Then I shiver and say God NO. It's too weird. He's like my BROTHER. it would be almost incestuous.