today fasted. but yet was so rajin that the minute i got home, i changed out and started vacuuming half the house. i thought might as well do it asap. i think i'll do the rooms tmr. it's better to do it like that bit by bit and asap, so that i won't be too drained during the weekend....i always am. I should start getting used to it...but I feel good. I feel the toughness in my arms returning..woohoo!! say byebye to flabby arms!!

yes, people who know will be cuffing me over the head, wondering how the hell can YOUR arms be flabby, you being that size? well Buster, they sure can. trust me. But after just one hoover i almost can feel the difference. yeah!

anyway, 'sall settled. I won't be going for matric fair...many pluses to this, since I want to fast actually. but i thought, if nadiah isn't looking after any booths or whatever, we can hang out, but since she is, then forget it....I'm not poking around booths where I don't want to be seen/associated with. I told her to sign me up for silat if she does during the matric fair. We won't be able to go out but no matter, no big deal. I don't really intend to hang out with her much. That PC module I meant to take with Reeza, but I don't know why I was such an asshole that I just asked her, because I thought it's just her, so no biggie. But yeah I should get used to the process of dissociation. I feel bad for mar, I can't take any module with her this sem :((( and i wanted to badly but then Chem dept mucked up everything and I thought she was just sticking with her econs and chinese so I went to look for another module. which came easily in teh form of Reeza.

unfortunately since I already promised reeza i couldn't back out....so yeah, i'm taking PC instead of IT, unless I don't get it. I would choose IT if it's the same time slot, only that it's easier to choose consider that TB class is 4-6 and IT is 2-4 and I can't run all the way to the arts Fac...it'll be horribly disgusting. I can't afford to be late either, you're graded according to your attendance. which is STUPID, if we're late SORRY LAH. think it's easy to atur timetable is it?

but yeah anyway i ended up going to ree's dance thingie. Shannon asked me too. I decided not to say a word, ree's mad with the Chinese dancers cos she thinks they stole her hp. I know better than to point out that it could have been a servant. when ree's mad she's mad. I'm not close enough as to point out those things to her yet, not like mar or nad.

but anyway, yah i know it's uncharacteristic of me. But because ree asked and asked and in the end i told her IF i can make it. and it turns out that i CAN, because i have only one lesson early on friday and tuition ends latest about 6...meaning I have lots of time to toodle off back to school. And what am I supposed to say, if she asks me what time is your tuition...zahzah tak tau lie, unfortunately..i'll just meekly tell her without being able to lie that it's 3.30 or so, and she'll be like THAT's PLENTY of time and then I don't want the whole md noor incident to repeat again..it was really bad....I don't want us to drift apart or fight forever....ree has always seen me as someone she can confide to, and if that changes I'd never forgive myself. I don't want her to drift away until I can't reach out to her anymore. so i thought, since she had asked and asked...and i didn't know how to say it such that it wasn't obvious i wasn't lying through my teeth, i've always been a freaking bad liar...and i ALREADY did promise i would go if i was free....so there i am. I don't want to support this dance dance thingie, i'm not into performance and that kind of stupid thing but i'd rather just relent this once and hold on to our friendship so that one day, she'll come back to us.

i'll just get nad to say hi to ree and tell her i'm not going cos i'm fasting or something. yeah. at least the matric fair thing is not as important as the dance dance thing. everybody'll be there. and i don't want to be where everybody is.